Just charge it!

Your children are quick studies when it comes to spending money.  They see you spending money all the time just in the course of daily living.  They spend time with their friends at the mall and learn what the latest trends are and want to appear “cool” to their friends. (I know the word “cool” is a word from my generation, but it seems to fit.) The problem is however, your children are not typically with you when you make your money.  They don’t see the effort that goes into earning a living.  They may see you leave the house and come home at night but they probably don’t understand what you are doing all day.  What they see is the stress that you bring home to the family.  They start saying, “I don’t want to work as hard as you do, Mom and Dad. I want a life!”  These are actual statements that my children have said to me and my husband.  They were sobering, to say the least! But what they didn’t fail to experience was the “spending” part of our lives.  The fruits of our labor, you might say.  They enjoyed the spoils, but did not appreciate the efforts that produced those spoils. This fact was brought home to me one day when my children were younger.  I had had a very stressful day at work (can you relate?) and was still somewhat preoccupied. My children and I were out shopping for school supplies and my youngest son saw a new video camera he wanted me to buy for the family (for once it was not just for him).  In my not so wonderful way, I said “No, we don’t have the money for that!” His response was, “Just charge it!  Put it on one of your credit cards!” At that moment, I realized that my son understood the spending part of credit cards, but not the paying part of credit cards.  My kids were with me when I was buying things on my credit cards, but not with me when I paid the bills each month. I happen to love my credit cards.  However I pay them off each month so that I am not charged interest.  But I realized my children didn’t know this! They didn’t know this, because I hadn’t told them.” In this generation, credit cards have become the payment of choice.  Intentionally or not, our children have learned instant gratification through our actions.  By falling prey to “Just charge it” impulses, we are teaching our children the wrong message.  94% of young people surveyed say they learn their financial habits from their parents (that’s us). ACTION STEP: When your next credit card bill comes in, review it with your children.  Discuss what it felt like when you bought something.  Are you still enjoying it?  Do you still have it?  How does it feel to pay for it AFTER the fact?  Is it as much fun paying for it as it was buying it? Sharing the “paying” side of life will educate your children about both sides of the money equation, buying and paying. Knowledge is power.